I have known many clients in my line of work as a coach who have survived emotional abuse at work or in other relationships. They usually possess a special kind of resilience that helps them rise to a higher level of functioning after experiencing significant adversity.
Believe me that if you have survived a toxic relationship, you are not damaged! On the contrary, many survivors have superpowers that allow them to heal from the experience of being in an emotionally toxic relationship. They can also learn and become great partners in healthy relationships.
The following are some superpowers that survivors of toxic relationships uniquely possess:
A high degree of emotional intelligence, empathy and compassion
These people possess a high degree of emotional intelligence, which starts with self-awareness. Toxic individuals are often very attracted to emotionally intelligent people because insightful people possess the very qualities the abuser is lacking. Survivors demonstrate their capacity to empathize with others and are often intuitive. They can usually sense what is going on in others, sense their feelings, and have deep compassion for other living beings.
Strength in compromising/problem solving
Many of these survivors are outstanding problem solvers. They know how to resolve conflict and reach compromises in challenging situations. Through their experience with toxic and challenging relationships, they have developed strong people skills and diplomacy.
Integrity and authenticity
Many of these survivors can express their honesty and align their actions with their words. This superpower leads to developing credibility and congruency that others can trust. Often, abusers are drawn to these qualities because they want so much to be associated with these traits themselves.
Humility and accountability for one’s actions
These survivors often possess a keen sense of self-awareness. They demonstrate their humility when recognizing and owning their responsibility for a mistake and then take action to make a change. When they free themselves from a toxic relationship, these survivors have the superpower of fortifying and reclaiming their boundaries, paving the way for healthier relationships in the future.
Capacity to create healthy relationships through what they’ve learned
Survivors generally learn what it takes to experience healthy and productive relationships in the future. Emotional abusers are mostly attracted to others who know how to do the work of relationships, so this is cautionary tale.
If you are a survivor of relationships with these kinds of toxic people, you have learned lessons that result in knowledge and a capacity to experience and develop healthy relationships. You will be able to recognize others who are able to reciprocate, and with whom you can build trust and develop mutual respect and satisfaction.
