Maybe you never thought you’d find yourself considering getting back together with your ex. Maybe you did. For many couples, breaking up and getting back together is almost inevitable; past research has shown that nearly half of broken relationships lead to reconciliation in some form after the initial breakup. In some cases, rekindling the flame of an old love can work; in other cases, not so much. Regardless, there’s a lot to consider if you’re thinking about getting back together with an ex. So how can you know whether it’s time to give a past partner another chance?
Here are some helpful ways to know whether it’s worth sparking up that old romance.
If you were still emotionally-tied to another unhealthy partner…
Maybe you weren’t ready to open your heart to someone new. Maybe you were still healing from the pain of another past relationship. Whether you realized it at the time or not, the fact was that you were simply not ready at the time to enter a new relationship. Now that you’ve had the time to reflect and heal from your past pain, you can now finally appreciate your ex without all the baggage you were still carrying when you tried dating the first time.
If they still have the same bad habits…
There’s a reason why you both broke up the first time. Regardless of whether you still have feelings for eachother, some people were not meant to be romantically compatible. If you’re not able to rely on your partner to change their unhealthy ways, how can you expect to trust them going forward? If you want a new, better relationship, don’t go looking for it in a messy past with someone who still needs to come to terms with issues only they can heal from on their own.
If you were both moving at different paces…
Maybe the timing was off. You were moving at a faster speed than he was, or vice versa. But now that you’ve both caught up with another and on the same schedule. External factors may have been the main cause of your break up the first time around, but now that you’re both finally moving in the same direction, it may be worth it to try again.
If they can’t accept change…
Depending on how long ago the first attempt was made, you might both be completely different people now. In some ways, this can be for the better. But if your ex is having a hard time adjusting to the new you, it may be a sign that things weren’t meant to be after all. Having a partner who values and encourages your personal growth is crucial for a healthy relationship. If your ex isn’t ready to embrace the ways in which you’ve evolved, it’s probably a good time to move on to someone else who will.
The points in this article are the opinion of the writer.
