Significant Mothers
July 2006
JAMIE LEE CURTIS
Actor, Writer, Photographer
Upon arriving at a recent speaking engagement, Jamie Lee found herself utterly lost. Unsure of where to go, she got out of her car and followed the women she was about to address, assuring herself that they would get her where she needed to go. “I realized at that moment how much I followed the women in my life, all throughout my life,” she remembers. She got to the podium on time because the women in her audience set her in the right direction; her path to strong womanhood, in a sense, was also forged by women — her female friends.
Jamie Lee attributes much of her growth and development to the support of the strong and talented women in her life. “I really refer to my girlfriends as ‘significant mothers’,” she says, “because each one along the line has really mothered me — teaching, nurturing, helping, and developing me.”
Because we enter the world without a guidebook, we imitate the women around us to navigate all the complexities, from learning how to pot plants and cook dinner, to understanding how to cope with stress or raise a child. For Jamie, witnessing a girlfriend juggle the demands of womanhood and come out on top became her inspiration as well as her unwritten guide. She assesses, “It’s amazing to watch a woman walk through life, death, birth, failure, success, fear and illness – and meanwhile, get dinner on the table, run a business, be a wife.” Equally important to guiding us through life, girlfriends provide us with strength. When her mother was dying, Jamie received support from her friends, who were there for her, helping out and preparing her meals without Jamie ever asking. “When the going really does get tough, your girlfriends will be there in a way that no one else will ever be able to comfort you because they will just let you be, and won’t want anything back,” she says.
Whether they are helping you, laughing with you, or teaching you, the unspoken bond women share goes beyond words. “Friendship is that deep unspoken, unknowing thing that is intimacy,” Jamie asserts. “That’s what I crave, and that’s what we live on. That is the marrow, that is the root of it all — intimacy, real human contact.”
Taken from an interview with Jamie Lee Curtis from the television program Best Friends: The Power of Sisterhood