When you come home at the end of the day, how do you feel? Are you tired and looking forward to a good book and a bath? Are you happy to be reunited with your pet after hours of being apart? Or are you left feeling burnt out and miserable, dreading the next day to come? Jobs are tough, for everyone, and speaking up about work conditions can seem intimidating–but the best thing you can do for yourself is speak up.
With two Emmy Awards and multiple published books, Helene Lerner knows what she’s talking about when it comes to furthering a career and working towards your goals. If you find yourself struggling to feel satisfied in your day-to-day work, here are three questions Helene suggests to ask yourself.
What excites you about your job? What frustrates you the most?
Knowing what makes you excited and what drives you out of your mind is one of the first steps to having a fulfilling career. Once you know what your passions are, ask yourself how your passion can be directed towards your job.
But if your frustrations lie in how you’re being treated by your fellow colleagues or a boss, ask yourself what you’re tolerating which you shouldn’t. Is someone constantly interrupting you during meetings? There’s an appropriate way to confront such a situation, using “I statements”, you’ll be able to fully articulate your grievances and how you want to move forward. For example: “I feel disrespected when you cut me off in meetings, this happened last week. If there something you have to say; please wait for me to finish, because I would like to hear what you think.“
Do you feel stagnant or are you moving forward?
If you can do your job blindfolded, great! But if you’ve been doing it for years and know you have more in you, now is the time to look for an opportunity. If there are additional skills you need to take that next step to go out and get them. If you are not networking enough with people who may be able to help you out with special assignments or potential promotions, make the time to get to know them. Get to work early, grab a cup of coffee with a senior supervisor or go to a cocktail reception when people in the know are invited.
Are you experiencing joy while you work? Are you more often feeling burnt out?
Self-care and taking a break is not just a luxury, it’s a necessity. I suggest after every activity you complete at work to take a deep breath and pause, yes, pause between activities. It’s like a mini recharge before you go off onto your next activity. If you feel you have too much to do and not enough time to do it in and you’re going to one to another without any break I doubt you’re as efficient as you think you may be.
These sentiments are gold nuggets of advice that are echoed in Helene’s book CONFIDENCE BOOSTER; How to Boost Confidence, Set Boundaries and Practice Self-Care in the Changing Work World, where Helene highlights the first steps towards feeling satisfied and successful:
“These beliefs [self-doubt] are what I call “mad mind chatter,” and they can stop us from speaking up and acting on our own behalf. As women, we may be telling ourselves lies that we internalized from the behavior of a teacher, a parent, an ex-boss, or even our current boss. If you focus on this negative belief, it most likely will lead to inaction, and you may stop yourself from getting what is necessary for your well-being. So you owe it to yourself to explore the negative beliefs that are getting in your way, with the intention of letting them go” – Helene Lerner, Confidence Booster, 10.
